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Surgeon Making $280,000 Asks If Her Actor Boyfriend Working Two Days A Year Is A Red Flag

MarketDash Editorial Team
3 days ago
A 40-year-old surgeon earning nearly half a million asks Dave Ramsey if she should be concerned about her 51-year-old actor boyfriend who worked just two days last year and refuses to contribute to their mortgage.

Sometimes you already know the answer but need someone else to say it out loud. That's exactly what happened when Jenny from Atlanta called into "The Ramsey Show" with a relationship problem masquerading as a financial question.

Here's her situation: Jenny is 40, a surgeon, and crushing it professionally. She made $280,000 in her first year and expects to pull in nearly $500,000 this year. Her boyfriend is 51, an actor, and worked exactly two days last year. His total earnings? Under $23,000. He doesn't qualify for the actor's union health insurance and has no side job to supplement his income.

The Mortgage Conversation That Changed Everything

The breaking point came when they discussed buying a house together. Her boyfriend informed her that since the house would be in her name and she earns significantly more, he doesn't believe he should contribute to the mortgage. Jenny added a crucial detail: "He also can't."

She wanted to know if it was wrong to consider this a deal breaker, even though she could afford to cover everything herself. Dave Ramsey and Rachel Cruze didn't hesitate with their response.

"Is that attractive to you? Are you like, 'What a winner?'" Cruze asked. Jenny's response was telling: "This is not how I had imagined being in a relationship."

Cruze made an important distinction: chasing an acting dream isn't the problem. The problem is the complete absence of effort between auditions. "I'm not mad at the dream, but the fact that there's nothing in between that's happening... that's not attractive to me as a woman who works," she said.

Ramsey was characteristically blunt: "He clearly is an unmotivated slug."

Partnership Versus Providing

Jenny admitted feeling uneasy about being the sole provider. "Even though I can provide for myself, I thought a relationship would be a partnership," she said.

Ramsey cut in: "I don't care if he makes as much money. I care that he doesn't work."

She explained that her boyfriend claims to receive some residuals from past acting work, but nothing close to livable income. She's tried discussing side jobs or doing something productive with him, but nothing has changed.

Then Ramsey asked the question that cracked the case wide open: "If you had a daughter that asked you this question, what would you tell her?"

Jenny didn't hesitate. "I would probably say, 'Can't you find a better guy?'"

The Decision She'd Already Made

That's when Ramsey delivered the truth bomb. "You already have made this decision and you just wanted someone else to say it out loud."

He warned that moving forward with this relationship would only breed resentment. "You're not suddenly going to have peace with this," he said. "You're going to get increasingly resentful and increasingly bitter."

Cruze pointed out that even if traditional gender roles are reversed, a partner still needs to show some kind of contribution. Ramsey added, "This is just, 'I'm going to sit on a log.'"

Jenny finally acknowledged what she'd known all along: "You're right. Thank you for being a mirror that I needed to see."

The issue wasn't about money or traditional gender roles. It was about effort, partnership and what happens when one person opts out entirely while the other carries the weight. Sometimes the most expensive thing you can do is stay in a relationship that's already over.

Back to News

Surgeon Making $280,000 Asks If Her Actor Boyfriend Working Two Days A Year Is A Red Flag

MarketDash Editorial Team
3 days ago
A 40-year-old surgeon earning nearly half a million asks Dave Ramsey if she should be concerned about her 51-year-old actor boyfriend who worked just two days last year and refuses to contribute to their mortgage.

Sometimes you already know the answer but need someone else to say it out loud. That's exactly what happened when Jenny from Atlanta called into "The Ramsey Show" with a relationship problem masquerading as a financial question.

Here's her situation: Jenny is 40, a surgeon, and crushing it professionally. She made $280,000 in her first year and expects to pull in nearly $500,000 this year. Her boyfriend is 51, an actor, and worked exactly two days last year. His total earnings? Under $23,000. He doesn't qualify for the actor's union health insurance and has no side job to supplement his income.

The Mortgage Conversation That Changed Everything

The breaking point came when they discussed buying a house together. Her boyfriend informed her that since the house would be in her name and she earns significantly more, he doesn't believe he should contribute to the mortgage. Jenny added a crucial detail: "He also can't."

She wanted to know if it was wrong to consider this a deal breaker, even though she could afford to cover everything herself. Dave Ramsey and Rachel Cruze didn't hesitate with their response.

"Is that attractive to you? Are you like, 'What a winner?'" Cruze asked. Jenny's response was telling: "This is not how I had imagined being in a relationship."

Cruze made an important distinction: chasing an acting dream isn't the problem. The problem is the complete absence of effort between auditions. "I'm not mad at the dream, but the fact that there's nothing in between that's happening... that's not attractive to me as a woman who works," she said.

Ramsey was characteristically blunt: "He clearly is an unmotivated slug."

Partnership Versus Providing

Jenny admitted feeling uneasy about being the sole provider. "Even though I can provide for myself, I thought a relationship would be a partnership," she said.

Ramsey cut in: "I don't care if he makes as much money. I care that he doesn't work."

She explained that her boyfriend claims to receive some residuals from past acting work, but nothing close to livable income. She's tried discussing side jobs or doing something productive with him, but nothing has changed.

Then Ramsey asked the question that cracked the case wide open: "If you had a daughter that asked you this question, what would you tell her?"

Jenny didn't hesitate. "I would probably say, 'Can't you find a better guy?'"

The Decision She'd Already Made

That's when Ramsey delivered the truth bomb. "You already have made this decision and you just wanted someone else to say it out loud."

He warned that moving forward with this relationship would only breed resentment. "You're not suddenly going to have peace with this," he said. "You're going to get increasingly resentful and increasingly bitter."

Cruze pointed out that even if traditional gender roles are reversed, a partner still needs to show some kind of contribution. Ramsey added, "This is just, 'I'm going to sit on a log.'"

Jenny finally acknowledged what she'd known all along: "You're right. Thank you for being a mirror that I needed to see."

The issue wasn't about money or traditional gender roles. It was about effort, partnership and what happens when one person opts out entirely while the other carries the weight. Sometimes the most expensive thing you can do is stay in a relationship that's already over.