Look, it's perfectly normal for siblings to help each other out. Adult kids leaning on parents for a bit of support? Sure, happens all the time. But when a 46-year-old woman keeps texting her 27-year-old little brother asking for money—while already owing their mom $800—we've crossed over from family support into something that looks a lot more like dysfunction.
That was the situation Brandon found himself in when he called The Ramsey Show from Denver. His older sister had just sent him another request for $100, and he was stuck. Not financially stuck—morally stuck. He wanted to help, but he also knew something was fundamentally wrong with this picture.
"I wanted to offer her advice," Brandon explained, "but I feel like she's going to be like, 'Okay, what is this 27-year-old punk trying to school me on anything?'"
Dave Ramsey Had Zero Patience For This Dynamic
Ramsey cut straight to the point with a response that probably made Brandon feel a lot better about his instincts.
"He's the one with the hundred dollars you don't have. That's what he is," Ramsey fired back. Then he really let loose: "She's an entitled brat. That's what she is."
Harsh? Maybe. But John Delony backed him up by making it clear that Brandon wasn't creating this mess—he was just being dragged into it.
"You didn't cause the rift. The rift was thrown at you," Delony said. His advice was simple: set a boundary and stick to it. "No, I'm not going to loan you a hundred dollars. Thank you, though."
Short, polite, firm. Anything more than that, Delony warned, is just trying to soften a line that needs to stay exactly where it is.
But here's the thing—this wasn't Brandon's first rodeo. This was the fifth time his sister had asked him for money. She'd also previously asked him to co-sign a car loan for her daughter, which he'd refused. And honestly, good for him. Because when someone nearly twice your age is routinely treating you like their personal ATM, something deeper is going on.
It's Not Really About The Money
Delony suggested Brandon use an upcoming family visit as a chance to address the real issue face-to-face. Take her out to lunch. Be kind, but direct.
"Say, 'I care about you. I know you've struggled. But I don't think this is about $100. Something's not right,'" Delony advised.
Then he delivered what might have been the most important line of the entire call:
"You just asked your little brother for $100. You're not OK. That gives you permission into speaking to hers and what's going on in her soul."
Ramsey agreed completely. "I know it feels weird because you're old enough to be my mother," he told Brandon. "But this is where we are."
The hosts were aligned on the diagnosis: this wasn't a one-time emergency. It was a pattern. And patterns like this don't get fixed with occasional handouts—they get worse. Enabling her financially would only drag Brandon down while keeping her stuck in the same broken cycle.
"It's like giving a drunk a drink," Ramsey said.
Even When Your Parents Won't Set Boundaries, You Can
Brandon admitted his parents still give his sister money when she asks, which only adds to his frustration. But Ramsey reminded him that he can't control what his parents do—only what he does.
"I'm willing to help my sister in a way that actually helps her," Ramsey said. "Not in a way that keeps her stuck."
The key, both hosts agreed, is making this conversation the last one about money. Have the hard discussion once, then hold the line.
"The next time she calls for cash," Delony said, "you just say no. No lecture. No explanation. She'll already know what it means."
And Ramsey delivered the final word: "Under no circumstances do you give her a hundred dollars—unless she's doing something that'll help her never have to ask again."
Love Doesn't Mean Being Someone's Financial Crutch
Here's what this call was really about: Brandon wasn't struggling with whether he could afford to give his sister money. He was struggling with guilt—the feeling that saying no to family makes you a bad person.
But the reality is messier than that. Sometimes the most loving thing you can do is refuse to enable someone who's stuck in a destructive pattern. You can care about them, want the best for them, and still draw a firm line.
Especially when they're old enough to be your mother.
For anyone dealing with a similar situation—whether it's an older sibling, a parent, or a friend who keeps turning their financial chaos into your emergency—the message from The Ramsey Show was crystal clear: helping someone doesn't mean rescuing them every time they ask. Real help sometimes looks like saying no and meaning it.




