Dave Ramsey doesn't sugarcoat his past. The personal finance expert frequently revisits his broke days, not for sympathy, but because those experiences fundamentally shaped how he thinks about money and control.
During a recent episode of "The Ramsey Show," Ramsey got candid about what being broke actually felt like on a visceral level. He wasn't just talking about checking account balances. He was talking about breaking down on the side of the road in a car that barely ran, feeling utterly powerless.
"I used to drive crap when I was broke and I was broke down on the side of the crappy road in the crappy car and my crappy life and I hated it," Ramsey said. "I hated it because I felt out of control and desperate and freaked out."
That lack of control, he explained, was the worst part. Now that he's built substantial wealth over the years, Ramsey said he experiences life differently. He drives reliable cars. He makes choices without constant financial anxiety hanging overhead. And he's noticed something interesting about how wealth changes the equation: it removes the friction that keeps people from being fully themselves.
"It's so easy to be who you are in spades when you got a few dollars," Ramsey said. "You know you get to be who you are. Nobody bothers you on that."
In other words, money doesn't necessarily change your personality, but it does amplify it by removing external constraints. When you're not fighting daily financial fires, your true character shows up more clearly, for better or worse.
The Control Problem
Speaking of character, Ramsey acknowledged one of his own personality traits that wealth has amplified: his desire for control. He admitted that stepping back from his adult children's lives has been genuinely difficult for him, and he's not pretending otherwise.
"I don't get a vote in their house and it pisses me off down inside," Ramsey said. "I really want to tell these people what to do. I'm just saying, it's a human thing."
He warned other controlling parents to brace themselves for this stage of parenting when they no longer have decision-making authority in their children's lives. It's honest, if a bit uncomfortable to hear from a parenting perspective.
Raising Kids Who Aren't Ruined by Wealth
This brings up a recurring concern Ramsey hears from the wealthy people he coaches: How do you keep money from destroying your kids? It's a legitimate worry. Plenty of research and real-world examples show that inherited wealth can create entitled, unmotivated adults if parents aren't intentional about how they raise their children.
Ramsey's advice is straightforward and doesn't involve elaborate trust structures or withholding money until age 40. Instead, he focuses on raising functional human beings who understand fundamental life principles.
"My answer is don't raise useless human beings," Ramsey said. "Raise human beings who know how to work, who know how to sacrifice, who know how to serve, who are humble, not self-centered. They're not entitled, they're not brats."
The emphasis is on empathy, work ethic and humility, qualities that theoretically prevent wealth from warping a person's character. Whether that's enough to counteract the effects of growing up wealthy is debatable, but Ramsey's point is that parents need to be deliberate. Don't just assume your kids will turn out fine. Teach them to work. Teach them that other people matter. Teach them that comfort isn't the same as accomplishment.
It all circles back to Ramsey's original point about control. When he was broke and broken down on the side of the road, he felt out of control and hated it. Now he has control, maybe too much of it by his own admission. The trick, apparently, is raising kids who can handle control responsibly when they eventually get it, whether through inheritance or their own efforts.